In the short-term (it’s not for the long-term,
not forever), work to understand and be content with yourself –
this is me, this is my shadow, this is my positive side. Once you
have that, then you really start noticing the impact on your meditation,
your prayer, your remembrance and that attraction starts pulling you
toward the Beloved.
In our prayer, we say, “Beloved, please guide
me to the right path, the path that You want.” That is submission.
The only way you will be pulled properly is if your submission is
done properly. You will reach to a stage where you see all that you
have been searching for and loving for, the Beloved has been doing
that long before you started looking for Him. At the end of the day,
it is the Beloved who pulls. You may work through your life to be
pious and pure, but if the Beloved does not want to pull you –
to attract you – you have no chance.
So, the repentance is important and the repentance
makes a Sufi humble; makes the Sufi appreciate the time that he hasn’t
spent for the Beloved. And that is enough. Beloved loves those who
repent – He is the Merciful and accepts all repentance. Why?
Because He knows Himself, he put the forgetfulness inside of us. As
long as we repent, we can return to Him if we decide to – that’s
our choice – but He is most happy and His loving never stops
regardless, even when we neglect Him.
In talking about developing your consciousness and
then abandoning it, it may sound it bit odd to talk about developing
something and then abandoning it. You may find that confusing. Why
would you abandon your consciousness after so much work? Simply, once
you experience the Majesty of the Beloved, the sensitivity, loving
and tenderness of the Beloved, you start forgetting yourself. The
consciousness you developed to pull yourself away from everything
becomes worthless because you have succeeded. Numerous Sufi poets
talk about the intensity of this love and of the nothingness.
The abandon is not really leaving it out, it is a transfusion
to your Higher Self – your consciousness goes to your higher
self, which is much more beautiful, visible and satisfying than just
the consciousness. In the consciousness, you’re trying to identify
and examine your fault but when you reach to the higher consciousness,
the Grace of the Beloved comes to you continuously; your acts become
what He wants because you are totally submitted. Like many Sufi Saints,
when they do things it has come to them from the Beloved, through
their act, daily routine, anything they may decide or go for, there’s
a reason for it because they’ve accepted total submission.
